Grace

Ellie has been having a little trouble with obeying the first time. I'm sure she is the only 4 year old with this dilemma. We've talked to her and she knows the consequences when she doesn't obey the first time. She just gets distracted. By lots of things!

Sunday night I got home late with the kids. Caleb was so tired and got into bed right away. Ellie was much more energetic (HOW? Where does that energy come from?) and was dancing around upstairs. I told her to pick out jammies and get them on while I put Caleb to bed. 5 minutes later, I enter her room. She is sitting there playing in her underwear. Sigh! Even though this is the 4th time and she hasn't obeyed yet, I don't really want to go through with the spanking. We've had a LONG weekend with the Holy Spirit conference. It is late. Aaron isn't home yet. So, I get some jammies out for her.

She starts to tear up. "I don't want those jammies."

"Too bad," I say. "You had a chance to pick out your jammies and you didn't. Now you have to deal with what I pick out."

She manages to get on her jammies (which are perfectly fine and clean and not scratchy) with many tears. We get to the bathroom to brush her teeth. She is crying. Meltdown has begun. Because of the jammies.

I sigh, and decide to give her a choice. "Ellie, you did not listen and obey and there is a consequence for that. But I will give you a choice. You can either wear those jammies, even though you don't want to, or you can change jammies but get a spanking." She thinks. And thinks. And she chooses the spanking. The mind of a 4 year old never ceases to astound me.

So after the tooth brushing, we go in to her room.

"Can I get the spanking first?"

"No, we'll change into your new jammies and then get the spanking."

She tears up. And then she crawls into my lap and looks up at me with huge round eyes, framed with long wet eyelashes, and she says in a very small voice ... "Mommy ... you gonna give me grace?"

"What did you say?"

Again, the small voice asks, "You gonna give me grace?"

"Ellie, what does grace mean?"

She looks at me, eyes huge. Then the small voice says, "It's somefing ... God gives me ... that ... I don't deserve."

And I hug her so she doesn't see me smile or laugh. So precious! And as I hug her, I ask God what I should do. Because there are times for grace, but there are also times for justice! And she really didn't deserve grace at all! But what would I be teaching her about God if I denied her grace? That when she asks God for grace, He will deny her? When we ask God for grace and forgiveness, He gives it to us ... even though we don't deserve it.

"Yes, Ellie, I will give you grace."

The eyes are wide. "You will?!?"

"Yes, even though you don't deserve it at all."

"So I won't get a spanking?"

"No spanking. Even though you earned one. Can you do better at obeying right away the next time?"

She nods and enthusiastically gets out a different pair of jammies.

And I thought how appropriate for Easter week. Because Easter week is all about God's grace towards us. However, Ellie had to ask for her grace. If she hadn't asked for grace, she would've received justice. It's the same for us. We need to ask for God's grace ... or we will receive justice.

~JG